31.12.09

adventures of years.

Before at Brett’s

June and Millie arrive. They walk in and there is Renee, Lois, Brett, and molly, Nick, Morgan and Taylah.

Taylah’s father had purchased her ten pulses for the evening and she had already consumed four by this time of eight o’clock.

Taylah is “pinging” in a sense and taking photos of people’s faces from around corners.

Taylah then proceeds to break a porcelain cow’s head that Brett’s mother had treasured from her childhood.

Millie falls on the ground squealing when she realises there are only two sleeps left until she get’s to see Sam again.

Lois wigs out at Millie wigging out.

Brett fills up a thermos with gin, vodka, wine, juice and lemonade, and some more gin.

Renee, Morgan, June, Lois and Millie then left after the arrival of Britt and Sharnie and the completion of a group photo and a story called the Canadian dingo, written by Millie.


The trek

Renee, Morgan, June, Lois and Millie all commence walking to Angus’.

None of them know where are they are really going.

Millie is drinking schnapps out of the bottle because she is a complete schnapps fiend,

and has a repetitive conversation with Morgan.


“Are we there yet?” millie asks

“Kinda, almost” Morgan responds

“We’re aren’t there yet are we?” millie asks again

“Not really?” morgan responds again

“Well, are we almost there?” millie again asks


June, Renee and Morgan are all singing and playing drop it like its hawt whilst the group of five is walking up the road.

Millie and Lois are at the back singing jungle book.

As lightening strikes the ground in the Far East, and occasionally lighting up the earth for a split second, the following is occurring;

June is drinking vodka and pine juice out of her HANDY bottle,

Morgan is consuming mascato out of a KFC plastic drink tub.

Renee is clutching a pineapple juice bottle filled with gin, Malibu and said pineapple juice

and Lois is waving around a pink drink bottle filled with vodka and apple and guava juice.

They arrive.


The party

From here on the author of this piece gets a bit confused.

Mostly because she is confused ninety-something percent of the time anyway,

but also because she was under he influence of schnapps.

  1. After having difficulty finding the path to where the music was coming from and confusion (from everyone) as to where the arrows were pointing, the group of five enter an open space.
  2. In this open space there is a cubby and house and people taking drinks out of their bag. There is also a wave of extremely loud music of the crap kind.
  3. It suddenly starts to spit, bearable spitting. It then equally as suddenly starts to pour down in buckets.
  4. The group of five make their way to a space under the cubby house where the rain is actually not saturating. Millie and June then take out a cigarette and starts smoking in the cramped confined space. Millie smokes that shit good to forget about their location. As people are standing on tables, and benches, sopping wet with rain and goon that people are spraying around in the air.
  5. People are aggressively dancing to the crap type music, people are screaming to it, and singing to it. There is mud everywhere, people are having goon poured into their mouth from a higher level and other people appear to have begun pinging, not on pulses, but on more serious type of drugs.
  6. Under the cubby house, Lois, Morgan, Renee, Millie and June are still sitting as people climbing down and up the steps keep stopping to shake hands.
  7. Lois then begins to say RATHER LOUDLY such things as

“I hate all these people!! These are all the people I hate!!”

A girl is sitting next to her talking and talking, and as Lois is on the phone she says to her “oh my god. I hate you.”

Lois then comes to the conclusion that the party is full of underage people, and she should steal their alcohol, even though they too were underage, but Lois figures they are more underage than she is.

“THIS FLIPPING PARTY IS SHEEP!

  1. June then goes out in the rain and disappears into the mad crowd.
  2. We do not see her until later when we ask her if she wishes to escape with us, she tilts her head sideways and says “im having fuuuuuun!” and then takes a swig from her bottle.
  3. Adam Broome approaches Millie and says something about how Millie used to hate him because he smoked, drank and did drugs. Millie doesn’t know what to say as she is holding her schnapps and a cigarette. Morgan laughs and says “Millaaay!!”

    Millie apologises for such behaviour and tries o make excuses. Then just keep on apologising. He say’s its okay and gives her a hug.

    Adam Broome hen approaches Millie again later and tells her something about a boat.

    “Oh I love boats can we go!!” Adam Broome begins to put his arm around Millie’s waist and she looks at Lois

    Lois then says to Millie, “MIILIE HE WANTS TO MAKE OUT WITH YOU, and HE DOESN’T KNOW YOU HAVE ABOYFRIEND”

    Millie turns to Adam Broome and then says “im sorry I have a boyfriend!”

    Adam say’s something and goes to a group of people who are spraying goon over everyone.

  4. “We’re fucking leaving” Lois says. Lois swears more than Millie when she is drunk.
  5. Millie decides she will ask her mother pick them up and take them back to Brett's, because walking to Brett's in such rain probably wouldn’t be the right choice.
  6. Millie, Renee, Lois and Morgan frantically grab their bags and belongings to run to the end of the road where Millie’s wonderful Mother is to meet them.
  7. Lois falls down in sludge just a few seconds after declaring she would lead the way out of this place. It was rather like someone sliding down a mud slide and landing like a dead ant with all their limbs in the air, but a dead ant holding a water bottle, filled with vodka.
  8. Renee then falls down again on the same path a few moments after Lois. The fact Renee just feel into a fence and onto the ground eludes Millie and if anything makes her more anxious to get clean ‘GET THE FUCK UP RENEE”
  9. Millie, Renee, Lois and Morgan proceed to walk down the hill to meet Millie’s mother. Lois is swearing about her hatred of the party. Renee is wet and is repeatedly “fucking her life,” Morgan is not saying that much, just telling everyone to scream ‘SCREAM AS LOUD AS YOU CAN,” and Millie is limping behind them, her shoe is broken and she is screaming ‘ALL I WANTED WAS TO GET SPIFFY. IT’S ALL I FUCKING WANTED! ON A HILL. ALL I WANTED WAS TO GET SPIFFY ON A HILL. FUCK I DON’T EVEN HAVE ANY CIGARETTES”
  10. At the end of the road Morgan and Lois sit down and Lois starts to play in puddles; “is it okay im playing in puddles?”
  11. Millie’s mother arrives and the group of four pile into the car and thank her over a million times. When they arrive at Bretts house Millie asks her mother if she has any cigarettes, her mother responds with “I might have left them at home, oh, look in my bag and see if there are any there.” Millie looks, and there is. She takes a few and says goodbye to her mother.


Back at Bretts

From this point on the author get’s even more confused, because of her sudden and heavy intake of schnapps.

  1. Lois, Morgan, Renee and Millie enter Brett's house wet and angry
  2. Renee, Morgan and Millie go into the bathroom and all shower in their underpants, the water is warm, this is good.
  3. They all get clean
  4. Somewhere along the way Millie put on a Ben folds five album and drinks excessively and dances excessively.
  5. Renee also lies on the couch wanting to nap but still drinking her vodka at the same time. Renee did not think that process through.
  6. Millie isn’t sure what Morgan was doing, though she was there with them. But Millie was more focused on the schnapps and Ben Folds.
  7. Somewhere along the way the Year actually ended. Politicians were dong the count down
  8. Renee Morgan and Millie then watched video hits, all still schnapping, napping, and being.
  9. Millie then falls asleep somehow in between dancing an drinking
  10. Millie is woken up and is moved into the other room with Morgan and Renee. They watch kill bill and eat pasta. Millie discovers Garlic salt.
  11. they fall asleep


The morning

In the morning numerous things happened. Renee was very tired, Morgan cleaned everything, Millie was possibly still drunk and lost her shit when she discovered Brett’s sock tub, Brett threw up his stomach lining, but it was actually just bile, Lois felt like throwing up, Molly and Nick were naked in Brett’s parents’ bed.

Millie then sneaked bottles into another recycling bin and got attacked by a wild dog, but not really.

Then everyone went home and slept. Except Morgan- who went to work

It was wet and cold and muddy and disastrous,


but Millie thinks it was massive fun :)







24.11.09

what not to do

i could write a novel on this topic.

anyways




do not:



firstly. be sitting in your room, which looks like russia has invented a bomb that contains masses of dresses and material, that accidently went off in your general vicinity. and do not NOT clean up or put the reminents of the explosion in a proper place.


secondly. do not decide that you will go looking in your garage, which seems like a whole world of absolute useless junk, and decide that from in this world, you will find something to put all of this material and dresses in- so you can use them at a later date.


thirdly.DO NOT DECIDE ON AN OLD BAR FRIDGE FOR THIS PURPOSE


fourthy. do not collect a bag of tools and unscrew the back, the top and the side screws of this fridge. then, do not get a MASSIVE pair of pliars- one that is so big it is half your size-and then use these to cut the chords and peices of metal that are connecting the back wire of the fridge to the bottom gear thingo.
because, from this a werid noise will begin to billow out of these cut peices of metal, and it will smell a little like gas or petrol


fifhty. at this point, do not take for granted if it occurs so that your brother will arrive home at that moment and say "what the hell are you doing millie" and automatically know that you are in a spot of bother.


sixthly. again, do not take for granted the fact that your ten year old brother seems to be smarter than you and cuts the bit of metal even further back and then bends the tip over itself so it stop the gassing buisness.


sevenly. at this point, do not think "okay it will be fine! yay, fridge here i come"

because i can tell you it will not be fine.


eithley. at this juncture. it would be advisible to retun the fridge whence it came, and go back to cutting up orange jungle-like cushion covers to hang on the wall so your room looks like a jungle.

it would not be advisible to, with much difficulty, drag out the fridge using one of those trolley things, and dump it on the grass. then rinse it out, and then proceed to again use this trolley to take the fridge into your room.


ninthley. from here, getting it into your room, do not attempt to put the bar fridge in various different positions, before deciding that, "you know what? this wont work."


tenthly. now, do not allow your brother to come into your room and point out the fact that your mother will murder you will a string of your odd socks when she discovers your evening activites. then, at this realisation, do not beg your brother to help you lift the fridge back up and onto the trolley, then wheel it to the garage. and when he refuses, do not offer him money. because then he wont be satisfied with only ten, but will lean against the wall until your offer goes up to twenty.


eleventhly. do not speed the fridge up the drive and into the garage, then very throughly attempt to eliminate any shrad of evidence that might suggest you had been dismantling a fridge and dragging it throughout the house.


twelthy. do not take for granted if your mother will have perfect timing and arrive home just as you had sat down. and then do not leave a dirty towel outside without an explanation.





this is what not to do.












"you know me, im impulisve"



18.11.09

the dying swn



i want to be as beautiful as this


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LmeDILoBdAo&feature=related



please yes :)





16.11.09

was it worth it


this makes me feel sick
it makes me want to be completley numb
it makes me feel so scared at the magnificence of it
it scares the living crap out of me
i wish i wasnt, but im terrorfied

10.11.09

pictures and words

im rather tired

"'Literature is a luxury; fiction is a necessity.'
G K Chesterton


my day


























and im feeling a bit
lost


and i just wish i could
fly

and then dissapear to
the moon


with my new amazing cup

















just for a while

until

the clouds become electric


8.11.09

hi my name is moreen and i'm going to rape you gently in your sleep


hi my name is millie
i'm a magician
which explains the ridiculous amount of stuff
ALL
over my floor
but if someone has a party
im set
:)

7.11.09

plans in action

i need to put plans in action













now.

in this clarity

of the path the other way

neither, neither path

my path.

Yeah .








talk.

at six thirteen am on a friday morning Lucy Angkatell's big blue eyes opened upon another day, and as always, she was at ocne wide awake and began immediatley to deal with the problems conjured up by her incredibly active mind.

i hate words. i have so much against words
they never mean what i want them to mean
and i always hate how they sound when i say them
BUT

i dont want to loose things, do i?
i want to be over here, and not over there
i want to have an open mind
and maybe i can live my life teetering everywere, maybe this is okay?
maybe this is exiting?
maybe i should just fuck it
and pick life.
even though its not that easy
but maybe i'm the only one who knows that.
im still not going anywhere
its almost like a would you rather.

but without peacocks or sardines.

ill just sit here, for little while longer
tied to a tree, to make sure i dont slip left by accident
but getting my courage to leap over.
i just need sum o' dat shiz
and im set.

i wish i was gangster
that would be so fun.



a dress in blue

I don't care if it hurts,
I want to have control.
I want a perfect body,
I want a perfect soul.
I want you to notice,when I'm not around.
You're so fucking special,I wish I was special.


oh wow
they such amazing lyrics
go radiohead for looking into my head right now
and going back in time and writing that in 1993
that didnt happen, but still

chips, mango sorbet, tea, rolls


i am currently sitting on my bed,
in my immensley messy room

but i kindof like it


i like my loud music, and my room with clothes, and pointe shoes
and bags, and rose petals, and paper and pencils
and hats and bags
everywhere
i like it.

amelia said to give myself twenty four hours
and maybe i will, i think i shall.

not now, not tomorrow.

maybe the week after

im at a cross roads.
apparently
and i really hate capital letters and long sentences.

but i dont know which one to pick
i know the one i should pick.
and the one i want to pick
but at the same time
the other path is so strong
and less painful
and easier.
i dont know how to make the "good" path easier and bearable
like the "bad" one

maybe im just lazy
but i really like this song
and my toes hurt like a mother bitch
:)





3.11.09

figments of the imagination

i dont believe in awkward

i believe that music is only ment be played loud

i believe in illusion

i dont believe in perfection

i believe in beauty in the different

i believe in impulses

i believe in elephants in rooms

i dont believe in being nowhere

i dont believe in good and evil

i believe in invisible rivers made of emotions

i believe in seeing things

i dont believe in the pointlessness

i dont believe in stillness

i believe in the inevitable

i believe in karma



starting now

its so early
i have never blogged this early
outside is calm, quiet
there is an occasional bird sound. but even the clouds arent moving.

im all ready for school, ready for my day.
sailor dress.
golden shoes
pink sock, music sock
grandpa hat
blue eyeliner
its all looking normal

but i wish i could do and do something else
after the same inane mundane thing day after day
bus, train, school, home.
home home home home
its like living on the top of the storm cloud
it seems quiet when you're up there
but you just have to listen for the rumbles underneath to understand where you really are
but its okay.
we do what we can to make life easier
sometimes i think i can cope, sometimes i think i cant

but it comes down to i have to, doesnt it?
we all have to be able to cope
no oen breaks down
or runs away to a tree house in india
that isnt how it works

i dont know how i feel today
maybe i will just go to school
bury myself in my music
bury myself in nmy revision
do some lunch time dancing
and just ignore it
that's so much easier




1.11.09

ready?


i wish i could tell you, i really wish i could

i wish i could open up my chest, because i most certainly would

and the music would spill out in the form of saxaphones and songs

then perhaps this explanation wouldnt be so hard and long

i wish i could take you back, back through all the scenes

then you would witness the day, and the falling leaves

the tables, the words, the thoughts and the days

maybe then i wouldnt be feeling so alone and dazed

i wish i could hand you my senses

maybe you would see my world through my lenses

they heighten when i feel the heat, or when i drink some tea

i wish you could hear and feel this, maybe just for me?

i wish you could hold my hands, and feel these feelings too

if i had to share them with someone,i hope it could be you

and you would feel the heat and the raging storms

having someone sitting with me, maybe i wouldnt feel so worn

28.10.09

so many things

okay so, a day at a time

but firstly. i wish i could make a dance that was almost like reading a really amazing book

or like a really amazing picture

almost like sam said "i want to make a song that looks like that," and he pointed at the clouds.

i want to make a dance that looks and means a word

a word that's what i want

that leaves the audience feeling not necessarily happy

but

alive

i want to make a dance that makes a sound. that makes a song. i suppose thats why you dance to music

but i want my dance to be like, the audience seeing the music. seeing the notes, the words, and the emotions

this is surley impossible?

but maybe not .

i do feel like sometimes i will explode with all these ideas and inspirations.
and then there is too much to be able to do it all

25.10.09

maye you will get a replacememt

my week
this was a talk about type of week
firstly
it was my last proper week of school
this week will be all dfyugif with the days and things :)

a few important events occured
uno. studying for le psych of ology

so very dedicated.





deux. oh wow, i had this amazing train trip.
firstly, this man with dread locks, and a guitar with butterfly stickers on it was at the station. and we were both down the end, the very end. i was dancing and then he came and i stopped. then he started to play his guitar. it was just, he was musing, standing peacefully next to his green bags full of baked beans and orange juice. then on the train carriage he was just standing up, opposite where i was sitting, and he was just playing, with his eyes closed, just humming. it was amazing, so peaceful
and then i found these cards!



it
was so very interesting. like a magic note
this summer i am going to write something, and then put it out into the ocean.


this week i am trying, no promises though
bye




20.10.09

plans






i have plans




plans that involve

a job,

and walking to bodhi tree after work,

simply having slipped into a dress and my elephatn sandals. and putting my hair up

and insents


and lots and lots of CD's


and british comedies


and hot days


and bed tents


and iced coffee


and salads


and lying around in my underwear

and then vodka

and light wind

and sleeping with my window open

and stars


and sam

and sarah

and cigarrettes

and blogs

and dancing

and candles

and so much music

and so much tea

and phone credit

and making clothes

and blowing fans

and relaxing


just lying down


occasionally talking to the one beside me



yes. these are plans











13.10.09

a white leafed tree

there are ten birds sitting on a tree, ten metres away from you and from me

lets sail away, you and me

there are ten birds atop a bleak, branches breaking under their beak

lets sail away, beyond the sea


one bird flutters and takes away, it goes to seek and find the frey

the second flaps and escapes at large, the boring life has become to hard

third bird leaps off in the sky, it's taking away to live up high

the fourth bird jolts and takes hesitation, its the rest of the world i forgot to mention
fifth white bird watches the clouds go by, and wishes for a scarlett tie

There are five birds sitting atop a tree, five metres from you and me
let's sail away, somwhere and undiscovered
there are five birds perching and sitting there, ready to fly without a care
let's sail away, somewhere quiet and so uncovered

Bird number six speaks to the sun, flying that far's never been done

the seventh flaps and sings all through, circling abouve and beyond the blue

the eighth follows suit and flys out after, following the echos of the laughter

the ninth jumps down branch by branch, how it knew- just a hunch
the last one left closes its eyes, it's happy to rest, by the byes

let's sail away, this blue skied day

let's sail away, let's sail away


flyings castles

imagine if i could stop time, just long enough
imagine if i could reach, to take a handful of
the smells of rose and jasmine, that hover in the air
the smells of smoke and fire, that are always breathing there
just so i can see them, flying past your face
just so i can look, so i can see before too late
before the smells engulf me, before they grab my hand
before they turn me round, and lead me to that land


imagine if it rained paint, buckets falling from the sky
imagine all the colours, falling from up high
so the winter days would not, not be dull and still
so when you looked around, the colours they would fill
feeling that purple, hearing that red and blue
seeing the green, and knowing its not just you
before the world starts moving, running at a race
before the day engulfs you, and rains upon your face

tell me a story about you,
tell me a story about what you do
tell me what you want from here
tell me why you sit in fear
tell me a story with a happy ending
tell me one, with a heart a-mending










12.10.09

stop and stop



you wont get this

no one will, probably


but just stop

feel that?



its still, peaceful, calm. absolutly nothing is moving

but electicity is buzzing in everyway



dancing flowers

i am currently in my spare. my monday spare
i love this spare


i am sitting on a wooden chair outside the humanities building.
teagan is here too, sitting a person away from me, just announcing that "some guy lived off his own tongue for a year"
"Teagan!" june, sitting opposite us, eating her spinni and ricci, obviously has a very strong veiw on this.
rory, who not an hour and a half ago at recess, pulled out a bag of magic mushrooms,
and he and chris, one of the music boys with the big pants, both had four magic mushrooms.
Rory proceeded by saying "this will be an interesting day"


indeed it is, he is standing up, wrapping his scarf around his hands, he keeps saying "man, im SO happy with this scarf!" He looks confused now though,
Teagan has just began a massive spiel about the man who lived off his own tongue.
"fuck off stuart, The Blair Witch project is real!" holly, who is sitting next to june, and leaning over to stuart on the other side, is wearing a massive gold sparkly cardigan that drowns her beautifully in a sea of sparkles and pearly buttons.
she looks rather distressed, as everyone is now shaking their heads
"no, holly. it's really not"
"yeah, nah, holly, nah."

the conversation has now changed from eating tongues to the Blair Witch project.
"fucking hell, fucking hell" annie is sitting next to me, her hair up in a large messy bun on the top of her head
she is the queen of hair in this group, it towers and looks down upon us
"holly, you need a break from these witch visions!" stuart, who is wearing his usual beanie, and pulling apart a vegemite roll, pats holly on the back, and she growls through her teeth.




today is so alive. this is why i decided to notice all this.

the air is tinging with senses


i love the wind, i love the sound of the wind
and the trees rusting together.
the whole world really does sound alive.
just like it is ment to be
the trees are talking to each other, discussing



the sun is up and down. peeping out at different intervals,
beaming down and heating everything up within seconds
before the clouds catch up and overtake.
its like the sky is playing chasey, like children
the whole world is just spinning and running



it makes me feel centered and peaceful
alive, nice
having the feeling of the wind rushing into your face
having to open my eyes
being in the same force as the wind



today was a good day :)
today is a good day.

it will soon be complete with dexter and sam
and the inscents in his room
that make my stomach knot, and my breath stop
because it all smells so amazing, and i want to savour it.

"are you pumped"
"nah, im mizone"

maybe im amazed?


:)







11.10.09

watch out for the flying me

i believe
it is sometimes healthy to go mad
turn off your lights
put the music up loud
forget your mind
and just be a body of bouncingness
and a jumble of everything
but it feels good this time
and just jump around
around and spin
up
and down
fly
jump
leap

whilst eating honey and butter squished between two arnott biscuits

this feels good :)


10.10.09

music and being

fuck wishing i was music lyrics
imagine being music


imagine being reincarnated everysecond
everytime different, never seeing anything the same


imagine opening your eyes
as you just e m e r g e from an instrument


out of a trumpet or a guitar
and then watch everything as you float up
and hear your echos behind you


i think that this would be amazing
making sounds, being sounds


i wonder what colour music sees in?
is everything a different colour depending on the note?
do you see yourself,
even though the rest of the world can only hear you and not see you


oh wow.
and so we will play the music loud enough that we dont hear the world falling apart

8.10.09

helium balloons

i sometimes i wish i was song lyrics

maybe that's why sometimes when i listen to songs i get so worked up
i just wish i was them.

perhaps this is why i dance mother?
because dancing is kindof like
seeing music

well that's how i would like it to be

"its an aquired taste, you need to just find the right one"
that is the definition i gave sam and sarah of bubble tea
as we were standing outside the bubble cup stand trying to decide what to order
and sam and sarah wondering why i had dragged them here

today was a day for things.
meditating behind the dance studio
playing a pregnent teenager in drama
discovering a new religion in philosphy
and winning a curly wurly in psych
which i do admit went to the chariatable cause, that was angus.

today was also a day for unknotting things
a little like my chest
it feels a bit more limber now
kind of a bit easier to move.

this is a strange feeling

i like watching the letters form words when it is set to centre
its like the word just appear from the middle of nowhere
and then they move, all by themselves
its amazing

today was also a day for my mother discovering my empty vodka bottle
and leaving me a note

 
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